What is one word that describes you?

Pondering this question isn’t that onerous. The second thing that entered my mind was ‘dreamer’. I’m big on aspirations. Someone once said, ‘Shoot for the moon. Even if you miss, you’ll land among the stars.’ Over time, I’ve had varying ambitions. I wanted to be a scientist, a real estate magnate, a pilot, an astronaut, a ball player, a priest. I took up media studies at uni. By then, I knew what I wanted: to be a bestselling author. While studying, I entertained the thought of dabbling as a screenwriter. However, I did not join any screenwriting classes.

Pilot Topher

Being a pilot would’ve been nice. Your job is to steer passengers to new locales. No doubt it’s stressful. Hundreds, if not thousands, of lives are in your hands. The perks of hopscotching is priceless. If you’re exceptional, you even have a shot at joining the astronaut program. Likewise, the pay is very generous. Yet the cons outweigh the advantages. Being a pilot is far from the safest calling. In one fell swoop, everything could go under. I’ve sighted the disasters on Air Crash Investigations. Furthermore, the hours would require you to be a night owl. I’ve always been the opposite: an early bird.

Ringless!

Meanwhile, basketball has been my life’s constant. I used to watch the games on telly. Friday nights were replays of nationally televised NBA games. I beheld the playoff atmosphere and gobbled the Finals. I took in NBA Jam, NBA Action, and The Basketball Show (with Bill Velasco). I purchased NBA cards. A large poster of Reggie Miller was behind my bedroom door. I used to buy hoops magazines. My b-ball journey extended well beyond the Association. I was a big PBA fan. I also devoured college hoops. The Ateneo Blue Eagles, representing an Ivy League school, were my favourite.

I played pickup ball. I had a somewhat inflated sense of my abilities. I was a good perimeter player but bad defender. My ball handling needed improvement. I best operated as a spot-up shooter. Though I had fresh legs, I never cracked our section’s rotation. Seems incredibly unfair that five starters play the entire game while others never leave the bench. In senior year, I tried out for the varsity but had a subpar audition. I did make the intramural squad (see also: One Game ).

‘Life’s a game’

I fared better at computer and board games. I played NBA Live and I still patronise Freestyle. At one on one, I once bagelled Kobe. It was winner’s out of course. I even utilised season mode, where I competed in twenty nine matches against other NBA squads. Ray Allen was my star while Starbury had triple doubles in each Finals tussle. Like Fukuda, he was our secret weapon. The Knicks were my team.

When I combatted other schoolmates at NBA Live, I had more losses than victories. The playoffs were my favourite mode. While I was bad at chess, I was a champion scrabble player. In three intramural finals, I won twice.

‘Boyhood’

Eough of that. As per above, writing has always been my calling. I was Sports Editor in Year 8. Associate Editor in Year 10. That senior year, my classmate the Feature Editor won a national writing competition. I was not handed the same chance. Since then, I’ve proven to be the more accomplished writer. I got two articles and a letter published in Misyon. I had another one that was adjudged letter of the month at Handle. So far, I’ve won three writing contests. I’ve maintained this blog with almost four hundred career posts, mostly since 2016. I’ve finished two uni degrees. I’ve self-published two books and have three other unpublished texts. This includes a 297-page memoir/self-help read that I released the other year.

Novels and stories

Just like the stars/moon quote, I am determined and resilient. Being a Pisces, I always have to dig deep to be more assertive. Hence, the three unfinished books. As one learned bloke told me, you have to be careful not to spend the rest of your life finishing your novel.

At the moment, I have a book of short stories and another nonfiction project that expands on my site’s posts. For the stories, I entered a few into writing contests. I already have the framework, so I just needed to expand, edit, and proofread. I must always provide my best shot. Every entry needs to be perfect and useable.

Two of my last three projects have been nonfiction. Aside from these, I’ve attempted two story collections (one published). As a result, I’d happily return to the world of make believe. To be honest, writing a novel is overkill. You need to be disciplined, fortunate, and locked in to pen fifty thousand words. At this point, the last thing I’d want is more unfinished reads. When I was a teenager, my goal was simple: to write the great twenty-first century Aussie novel. This is easier said than done, but a nice dream. Back in the day, I’ve read Catcher in the Rye and To Kill a Mockingbird. Both have been lauded as the novels of the past century.

Novella dreaming

A novella, though…that’s something. Hemingway’s Old Man is just over a hundred pages. It’s ‘coming soon’ on my reading list. Kafka’s The Metamorphosis is another prime example. The Stranger by Camus is a captivating read. I’ve devoured both novellas. The short novel is in scant supply. Writers prefer either the novel or the short story. The novella is somewhat of a tweener: it’s neither long nor short enough. Too many pages for story readers and inadequate for novel lovers. I understand.

Regardless, if I could put in thirty to forty thousand words, that would be sufficient. I’ll admit that 160 pages is far from a pushover, especially for me. I’ve never penned a novella. When you think of it, it’s equivalent to four short stories. I am hopeful but not exceedingly confident. Completing a novella is the final, very arduous step to pursuing my most desperate writing goal.

When life gives you hurdles, make stories. Being short on ideas is not a crime. It happens to the best of us. Being without spirit? That’s unacceptable. A man without dreams is a zealous cager without the leather.